


Same Old, Same Old

by justcallmeasmodeus



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Dean/Reader - Freeform, Drabble, Reader-Insert, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-05 20:25:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13395594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justcallmeasmodeus/pseuds/justcallmeasmodeus
Summary: A small drabble to the song Same Old, Same Old by The Civil Wars





	Same Old, Same Old

_I wanna leave you_

_I wanna lose us_

_I wanna give up_

_But I won’t_

 

“I never should have brought you into this.” The words ran out like gunshots in the library, but you didn’t back down from Dean’s raised voice.

“So what then, you regret me?”

“No, I don’t regret you, I just regret ruining your life.”

“How can you say that Dean?” Tears were streaming down your face as you danced around the tables, always staying just out of reach. “How can you say that you wish we had never met and how could you _possibly_ mean it in a good way?”

“Because I’m done fighting okay Y/N? I’m done with this back and forth, up and down, hot and cold bull shit.”

“So that’s it then. Five years all comes down to this?” You stopped yelling and let your voice drop, which Dean knew was even more dangerous than the yelling. He would rather have you scream at him all night long than hear the utter defeat in your voice and see it reflected in your eyes.

_I wanna miss this_

_I want a heartache_

_I wanna run away_

_But I won’t_

“Y/N no, please don’t do this. We can get through this, together. Just like you always say.” He reached for you but you pulled away, taking two steps back and backing into the bookshelf.

“Not this time Dean. I can’t keep doing this either. We’ve been having the same argument the entire time we’ve been together.”

“I’m trying to not be so overprotective! Can’t you see that? I gave you a gun, I taught you how to fight, and shoot, and defend yourself.”

“That’s not even what this fucking argument is about!” You shouted with a step forward, causing him to step back.

_I’m gonna break things_

_I’m gonna cross the line_

_And make you wake up, cause you won’t_

_I’m gonna name names_

_I’m gonna call us out_

_I’m gonna say it, if you won’t_

“Then what is it about Y/N?”

“You refuse to let anyone love you!” 

Dean was stunned silent by the accusation. The silence sat between the two of you, heavy and somehow louder than the shouting. The line had been crossed, and there was no going back now. You knew you had Dean’s heart in your hands, and you knew you were ripping the old piece of leather now.

“What are you-”

“Lisa. Ben. Charlie.” You began listing off names, your voice steady and even. “Clair. Judy. Cas. Sam. _Me_.”

Dean’s eyes began to darken and shine with tears, and you knew that you were hitting your mark.

“We all wanted to love you, but you wouldn’t let us. Every time we get close you push us away in some heroic attempt to save us from yourself.”

“That’s not true.” Dean squared his shoulders, and you knew you had no other choice.

_Oh I don’t wanna fight_

_But I’ll fight with you_

_If I have to, if I have to_

“It is true and you know it. You push us away in a sick attempt to shelter us and then your head is stuck so far up your ass you can’t see that you’re the one hurting us.”

“I tell you that I love you all the time!”

“Saying it and accepting it are two different things Dean.” By now your voice was cold, and you had made up your mind. You both knew it. “I can’t keep doing this.”

Dean walked forward to hold you, and you slapped him across the face before either of you could process what was happening.

“I can’t keep doing this.” You repeated, turning away from him.

“Y/N…” Dean called, his voice cracking.

You knew that if you turned around right now you would let him hold you. He would be reaching for you, his adam’s apple trembling as silent tears fell down his face. It had happened many times before, and it was on the road to many times again. You held your resolve.

Each step toward the door felt like a hundred. You heard Dean sink to his knees behind you, and everything inside you begged you to turn around. Every fiber of your being screamed for you to comfort him, to hold him close and murmur comforting phrases and apologies in his ear. The door handle burned your skin as you pulled it open, pausing only let one more phrase float on the air between the two of you.

“I love you Dean Winchester, and I will love you until the day I die.”

_Do I love you_

_Oh I do_

_And I’m going to ‘til I’m gone_

_But if you think that I can stay_

_In this same old, same old_

_Well I don’t, I don’t_


End file.
